Ep 8. Finding a New Path: Brittany Brown’s Adoption Story

Join us in this touching episode, “Finding a New Path: Brittany Brown’s Adoption Story,” as we delve into Brittany’s remarkable journey. Despite her challenging experiences with pregnancy, Brittany’s deep yearning to become a mother persisted. Discover how an unexpected opportunity arose when a fellow church member expressed the desire to give her child up for adoption. Through this heartwarming tale, witness how bonds were formed between two families, ultimately uniting them through love, compassion, and the shared joy of motherhood.

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Dear God: Thank YOU for Getting Me Here!

 

Recently I decided to read the Gospel of John in the Bible
with fresh eyes. Basically this entails trying to forget I know any of the
information contained therein and try to take it in like  I’m reading it for the first time. I’m doing
this in an effort to know Jesus more and differently than before.

In my quest to do this I came upon a verse in chapter one (Amplified version) that
I had never seen before. It’s this one – verse 13, that I made a graphic of. I
can’t believe I didn’t notice it before. When I came across it this time, it deeply spoke to me. 

For a long time I’ve said
that I feel like I was dropped out of heaven, not really of
this world. Please don’t misunderstand, I’m not implying that I’m God or any
type of god, or an angel. Certainly not. What I am saying is that I’ve never
felt like I fit in here. A huge part of that is all the pieces that are still
missing. I have very little  information to speak of about my first two months of existence in the hospital and foster care. I have no photos of myself before three months of age.   I have heard many adoptees say they have a hard time feeling like they
truly exist because they don’t know where they came from or who they came from.There are many unanswered questions, and my bio mother chose to go to the grave refusing to answer them.  So, I give God the credit for getting me here. He gets all the gratefulness.Thank you, John 1:13. You rock. I am born of God.

The Disappointment of a Lack of Close DNA Matches

I used to see this in
my inbox and get terribly excited. My heart would race and my fingers couldn’t
log in fast enough.
 Now I see this
notification and sometimes I don’t even log in right away.

Everyone says, “Don’t
stop believing…” Honestly some days I
do, and some days I don’t. My faith is high for
other people, and other things, but when it comes to having faith for myself, it’s often low. Maybe it’s that adoptee
curse of always feeling like you will be the one who is different.   I logged in yesterday
to see my matches and none of them even made the front page. They weren’t close enough….like 5th-8th cousins.

Unless my father lives
to be an extremely old man of Biblical proportions, time is running out.

I continue to hold on
to all of my many blessings in life, and accept the fact that this may not be
one of them.

Why I Struggle With This Time of Year More Than Any Other as An Adoptee (And Who God Sent to Help Me With That!)

Last week I received a Facebook friend request from a lady
named Linda. I was so excited. She is Kenny’s wife!  (If you have no idea who Kenny is, you need to read my last post.) Kenny is not connected on social media, but Linda is. And she’s just the sweetest. Here is part of her first communication to me
on a Facebook message:

Hey Deanna! It’s wonderful to hear from you. Kenny and I feel
like you’ve become family.  Kenny has
been checking with people in the family and people that might have graduated
with your Momma. We haven’t heard anything that would help you yet.  But as you know, God is great every day! I am
praying for you that God will lead you to some answers and peace of mind in
knowing about your Daddy and other family. That would be a blessing for you. I
hope Kenny and I can meet you one day. I hope you and your family have a very
blessed Christmas. 

This is the first of many messages with Linda and I am beyond
grateful for this couple. For all the frustration I have in dealing with a few  idiots people with my search, I am reminded through people like Kenny and Linda that there are
people who are willing to help a person who was once a stranger.   There are people
with heart, who do the extra mile without being asked. (I initially asked Kenny
to help but now he and Linda do a lot of searching and talking to people without
me even having to ask. They really care.)

It was a joy to mail Kenny and Linda a Christmas present yesterday and thank them for their kindness.   

I realized a few days ago that it seems like the Christmas season is always the worst time I struggle with the issue of not knowing my natural father. Every holiday season my friend Gayle and I talk about it more than any other time. I drill down in working on the search during the month of December more than any other time even though it’s a crazy busy month! I was ruminating on that this past week and tried to figure out what it is about Christmas that compels me to do this. 

I suddenly realized, it has nothing to do with Christmas. 

It’s the fact that another year is almost over, and I don’t know who he is yet. And if he’s not dead, time is running out. 

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